Jane Doe's blurb :D
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June 12, 2008
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For those of us who still sleep with stuffed animals, just because he got them for us.
This goes out to those of us who never lets go of her cell phone.
This goes out to those of us whose heart swells with pride every time the national anthem is played.
This goes out to the proud women who stand tall behind a United States soldier.
We sit and we wait, for a letter, for a phone call, and for the lucky ones, a homecoming.
Many people don’t understand this life; they say it’s unfair, they say they couldn’t do it.
Well, here is our response....
Do not tell us you’re sorry, or that you know how we feel.
Don’t try to make us laugh when we’re sad, we don’t want to laugh, we’d rather sit and think about our man.
We may not be “happy” with all of this, but we don’t mind waiting.
To us, it’s an honor.
We are the girls who wake up every morning with a sick feeling in her stomach; we’re the ones who just lay there for a minute to prepare ourselves for the day ahead.
We’re the ones who look forward to going to sleep; because they are with us in our dreams.
We are the ones you see wearing a sweatshirt or t-shirt that is 2 sizes too big just because it’s his.
This is for those of us who’s best friends they have never met; we meet them on myspace or support groups.
They are those only ones who understand.
This goes out to the women who spend holidays alone, this is for those of us who take pictures to send to our men when we wear a cute outfit or have a good hair day.
We know the real meaning of love, its not cute presents or formal dinners; its hearing his voice, it’s seeing him for the first time in many months.
For those of us that know what a chow hall is, those of us that know terms like head, rack and porthole.
This is for those of us who belong to a United State soldier.
You may see us struggle but you will never see us fall.
We are among the silent ranks; we are the few, the proud, the ones left behind.
We are bonded together by the United States Army.
Our men are brothers, a family of one.
Each one of us have one of the few.
We stand tall and we stand strong.
We stand behind our soldiers through thick and thin.
♥
We are the girls of the United States Arm
y
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May 21, 2008
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Loving a soldier is a high price to pay,
Loving him truly is hard when he's away.
It's being alone with nothing to hold;
It's being young, but feeling old;
It's having him whisper his love for you;
It's whispering back that you love him too.
There comes a kiss and a promise for more,
As his plane slowly rises to soar;
Reluctantly, painfully, letting him go,
While your insides are dying from wanting him so,
Watching him leave with eyes full of tears,
Standing alone with your hopes, dreams and fears.
It's sending a letter with the stamp upside down,
To a far away love in a far away town.
It's going to church to kneel and pray,
And really meaning the things that you say.
Being in love will foster your dreams,
Of that far away soldier your mind fairly beams.
Days go by, no mail for a spell,
You wait for some word to hear that he's well.
Then a letter arrives, and you've given in,
To open his letter and read it with a grin,
Yes, he is well and misses you so,
It's filled with the love you wanted to know.
Weeks are like months, and months are like years,
You wait for the day when you'll have no more fears.
Days go by slowly, how many have passed?
Yes, loving a soldier brings bitterness and fears,
Loneliness, sadness and despondent years.
Loving a soldier isn't much fun,
But it's worth the price when the battle is won;
And remember he is thinking of you everyday,
He's sad and he's lonely while so far away;
So love him and miss him and hold your head high,
Be strong and have faith, wipe that tear from your eye.
It's the high price you pay for loving a soldier…
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May 15, 2008
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When we're maneuvering the hallways of work or school, wearing our soldier's clothes that hopefully still smell like him, we know you don't understand. You don't know that he's the only thing on my mind during work and any other time. You'd have a hard time too if you knew your boyfriend was training to kill. Since you're not an army girlfriend, you don't know the strength it takes to develop a routine, day after day, masking the pain and loneliness from being deprived of the one man I love.
Since you're not an army girlfriend, you don't understand the true meaning in goodbye. To you, long absence away from your boy constitutes a weekend apart; but to me long a long absence from my man can span over a year. But I wouldn't expect you to understand. And you see, that's why I just smile and laugh when you try to sympathize. Your sympathy comprises words with no meaning with a fake smile to follow (if I'm lucky).
I also don't expect you to understand why I can't call my boyfriend at the whim of my speed dial number 2 to ask him why he didn't meet me for lunch yesterday. In our world, tedious calls like that aren't even fantasized, simply because we don't waste our time with petty arguments. So you ask me how often I get to call him and see him; and you're aghast when I tell you I won’t see my man for another eight months…you proclaim that you could never do that. Well, that's obvious,but instead of retorting I just shrug and smile, because I know you couldn't handle it. It's fine. Not just anyone is cut out for the lifestyle…but I am, and so is my soldier.
With that, you tell me I'm in for heartbreak, and I tell you he's the only thing that keeps my heart together. You don't understand the utter tragedy when you have to let go of your soldier for the last time, or right after their departure, you hear that 10 more soldiers died in the war. To you, those soldiers are just another statistic; to me, they're people with histories, families, and loved ones. I hurt because they do, because every service member enlists knowing the possibility of death, I too suffer the same forced acceptance. I know that at any moment, my soldier could be that "statistic" on the news. But I wouldn't expect you to understand.
You tell me that with all that said…that we'll never make it. I tell you, as level headed as possible, that just because you're weak doesn't mean I am. You tell me he'll change, I tell you so will I—but you don't understand that change. You don't understand how much you are forced to grow up when you're faced with the reality of life and death.
But who are you to me, anyways? While you're wrapped up in the arms of your boy thinking about plans for tomorrow night, I'm wrapped up in a blanket thinking about my man and our future. You live for the moment; I live for what's to come.
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April 20, 2008
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Grandpa died..we're preparing for his cremation...going to take a week off from ebaby and maybe more..
RIP Grandpa, love you and wishing you all the best there in heaven...
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April 17, 2008
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my grand pa just died and what I'm doing is being a post whore over here...
still kinda shocked n waiting for flight.
here's an email i got from John Doe. it's like a nice warm fireplace during the storm..
Subject: 20 reasons Because
To :janedoe
1.Because you Love my daughter.
2.Because you can make me smile without even trying.
3.Because you put up with me even though I'm stupid and lazy.
4.Because your emotional feminine moments are less frequent then most women I have known.
5.Because after over a year knowing you you are still able to turn me on by implying that I might get a show during the conversation.
6.Because of your eyes.
7.Because of your heart.
8.Because of your spirit.
9.Because you love God enough for both of us. lol.
10.Because even when I get emotionally female you still put up with me.
11.Because you like my drunken sweet talk.
12.Because you're totally random and silly
13.Because I can't remember being without you.
14.Because I can't imagine being without you.
15.Because you buy me pink boxer
16.Because I have to made some videos for you and had my friends make fun of me. lol
17.Because Jane Doe sounds good.
18.Because your mom adores me.
19.Because you speak cute English.
20.Because I had never known what love was supposed to be untill I met you.
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